


A Slice of Baby Life

by Eilatan_Sevol



Series: A Slice of SKZ Life [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Smut, Graphic Description, Happy Ending, M/M, Mpreg, Not Beta Read, One Shot, Slice of Life, Surgery, Time Skips, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:02:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28261338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eilatan_Sevol/pseuds/Eilatan_Sevol
Summary: “Are you tracking it?” Felix looked like his face was trying to eat his eyes with happiness.“Well yes.”“Why?” Felix was still smiling as he scooted closer and leant his head on Chan’s shoulder to flick through the app while the elder still held the phone.“Well… You aren’t.” Chan said playfully.***“DON’T BE STUPID! OF COURSE I WANT THE DUMPLINGS! I ALSO WANT THE RING!”***Attempted equal parts Minsung and Chanlix, slice of life fic that follows them through stages in pregnancy and relationships.TW//- Graphic descriptions of surgery- Mental Health challenges- Potential loss of a child- Abortion discussions(Don't read it if you don't like the male pregnancy thing. That is all it is.)
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Series: A Slice of SKZ Life [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2095884
Comments: 8
Kudos: 91





	A Slice of Baby Life

**Author's Note:**

> Not Beta read.  
> We die like men.

“Yeah, I know it’s a thing Minho, but how!? WHO!?” Chan asked angrily. At first, Chan had smiled when Minho told him… Then he thought harder on it.

“Well, we haven’t talked about it being serious or anything so I don’t really think I should tell—”

“Who?!” Chan huffed again, his arms folded this time, so he meant business.

Minho pulled his mouth into a line with a hiss over his teeth as he prepared to spill.

“Changbin?” Chan guessed and Minho was shocked… Then disgusted…

“Changbin?! NO!” Minho defended.

“Is he in the group?”

“Well…” Minho hadn’t actually though of saying it was someone outside the group. “Yeah.” He said, it was too late to make up something now.

“Be honest…” Chan started and closed his eyes with one hand raised as if to prepare himself for the worst, “Is it Felix?” Chan said softly and Minho almost laughed at that.

“No… Hyung. You're safe. It’s not Yongbok.” Minho said with a smirk and Chan glared.

“What do you mean your safe!?” Chan glared again, Minho shrugged, “Look, it’s not my fault you got knocked up but now it’s my problem.” Chan glared. He was trying to be direct but not mean. Minho admired that about him, but it also made him soft.

“Well actually, _I_ am not the one that is… Pregnant.” Minho said and Chan looked confused. Then he thought, then he opened his eyes wide in realisation.

“… Where is he.” Chan said as he made to storm to the younger.

“Actually…” Minho said as he quickly stepped in front of the leader with his hands up to stop him. “He’s still at his mothers house.” Minho said nervously. “He is coming back any minute now.”

“He is coming on his own?” Chan asked incredulously. “At this hour!?”

“It’s fine Hyung! He isn’t showing yet! No one can tell! I swear!” Minho tried to stop Chan again, though less successful as he was just pushed along back wards towards the door.

“I don’t care about—I mean I do care about the photos, but he is pregnant! That’s not safe!” Chan grabbed his jacket and slipped his shoes on before heading out the door. Minho groaned and turned to go back and text Jisung that Chan was on his way to the station.

Felix came out of his room from next to the front door with tears in his eyes. Minho froze when he saw the breaking boy.

“How… How did you know?” Felix asked quietly and Minho blinked.

“Know what?”

“I heard you and Channie Hyung. You know I’m… I’m… It was an accident.” Felix voice cracked on the last word and he started crying again. Minho set his phone down and fast waddled over to hug the small Australian.

“Oh Lix, it will be ok.” Minho patted his head. “But we didn’t know.” Minho spoke softly. Felix sniffled and looked up confused. Minho sighed. “Hannie.”

***

“So. We will be going on a break so 3racha can focus on writing and producing, Hyunjin will be pursuing his solo stuff, Seungmin his hosting and solo stuff and Jeongin his schooling.” Chan said as a wrap up to stays on Chan’s Room. Chan gave them their hug and promised to be back soon. He promised to keep doing Chan’s room and assured everyone it was not a one direction version of a hiatus.

Chan shut the camera off and checked his phone. 2 missed calls and 3 texts from Felix.

‘You look handsome today UwU’

‘I require ice cream’

‘And hot dogs’

Chan rolled his eyes and smiled. He packed up his bag and headed back to the dorm.

When he arrived home, Felix was cuddling with Hyunjin on the couch. Hyunjin looked teary.

“I changed my mind; I don’t want to go solo.” Hyunjin shook his head. “I’m not the Harry Styles of the group!”

Chan set his stuff down and sighed.

“No, that is Seungmin and you are not going solo, you are doing a side project. We are still stray kids.” Chan said, “Besides, you will be carrying the team, we need someone for JYP to promote for us or we’ll be in trouble.”

“We ARE stray kids, but Lix and I are going to make a subgroup for the babies and call it ‘Kids Kids’ Han laughed while dancing in the kitchen. Chan rolled his eyes.

“You get a break and think these jokes are ok?” Chan asked and Han stopped, bowed an apology, and returned to cooking with Minho.

Chan sat next to Felix and Hyunjin and pulled his phone out. As he unlocked it, a loud celebratory ring chimed and Felix looked over. A notification popped up.

‘3 months in! Welcome to the second trimester!’

Felix smiled at Chan.

“Are you tracking it?” Felix looked like his face was trying to eat his eyes with happiness.

“Well yes.”

“Why?” Felix was still smiling as he scooted closer and leant his head on Chan’s shoulder to flick through the app while the elder still held the phone.

“Well… You aren’t.” Chan said playfully.

“I also track every time you guys have sex. Helps me plan my time away.” I.N Added from the computer.

“Ew! Don’t say it like that!” Felix complained but Chan smiled.

“Am I wrong? That how you know the day right? You knew when you had sex to conceive!” Jeongin laughed and Felix scrunched his nose up.

“Never mind that! Felix, Show him!” Han said as he came into the lounge room. Both Han and Felix have taken to living in exclusively oversized shirts now and zero effort into their hair or make up. Chan secretly loves it.

Felix put his hair band on that he stole form Hyunjin and gave Han a matching one. Chan was worried Han wasn’t going to cut his hair during this whole pregnancy.

“Felix and Han laughed as they faced each other and pulled their shirts up. Anyone else would have thought they had overeaten.

“TWINS!” Han shouted and Felix laughed.

“What if they are born on the same day?” Hyunjin asked with a smirk.

“Then we can just say we had food poisoning” Han said as he fixed his hair band.

The conversation carried on a little bit more and got sillier, all of them thinking of things they could say as to why they were in hospital once they have given birth.

But Chan had been holding off. He was taking care of the career side of this situation and now it was announced and they had the next year out of the spotlight, a rush of panic made him ask.

“How are we getting back?” Chan’s question cut through the laughter and Felix looked confused.

“From the hospital. How are we getting back?” Chan let out a shaky breath. Felix looked over him with worry. “We will need a baby seat… Will we take the vans? Should I drive? I need to get my Korean licence. Minho!” Chan shouted and the other poked his head in from the kitchen. Han and Felix looked between them as they spoke.

“You have to get your licence!” Chan said and Minho blinked. “To drive Han home from the hospital! I have to get mine! Or should I drive Han as well? I think we need different cars. I need to buy a car. A family car. Like one that can fit a seat in it. How long are they in a seat for? Are we having more? More can’t fit in a small car… More can’t fit here. Are we going to keep living here? OH! We can’t! This is not a space for kids! This is a dorm! I need to buy a house! I wanted to buy in Australia though. We can’t even get there because of Covid! How are our parent going to see them!” Chan directed his attention to Felix. Han took the opportunity to remove himself and Minho.

“Uhh.”

“Face time.” Chan nodded as he answered his own question.

“Chan, I don’t think we need to worry, we can plan around it all…”

“Hyunjin needs to be somewhere where he can focus on his music. Same with Seungmin. I.N? Who knows?”

“Chan it’s fine, I promise.” Hyunjin tried to help but there was no stopping this train.

“No, Hyunjin, Seungmin and Changbin will have to move out if we are going to stay, they could go to an apartment down lower? A two bedroom one? I don’t want them to go far. Jeongin can stay here if he wants. I will have to pay more for this place with Changbin gone. Han will need to too. Hyunjin! You will need to help paying for rent in the new place once you get off the ground with your solo.”

“You said it was a side project!” Hyunjin defended.

“Yeah, yeah. That.” Chan waved him off. Hyunjin got up to leave.

“Have you looked at strollers?” Chan asked Felix. Felix was watching Hyunjin.

I.N followed Jinnie.

“No Chan. Why are you doing this?” Felix asked sadly.

“Doing what? Planning?” Chan defended.

“Pissing people off Hyung.” Felix said and Chan furrowed his brow.

“I am pissing people off, am I?” Chan asked sarcastically and Felix rolled his eyes with a sigh. “Oh, I’m sorry that I thought maybe a little planning could happen before a fuckin’ child arrives!” Chan argued and Felix glared.

“You know, I didn’t get pregnant on my own Chris.” Felix stood and stormed to the kitchen. Chan called after him. Felix looked up when he saw Minho and Han with wide eyes, shaking their heads and waving him off. Felix looked confused then clocked on to the meaning.

Felix rolled his eyes again and stormed back out to the lounge room.

They didn’t want Chan to follow into there and keep arguing.

Felix sat back on the couch, decidedly further away from Chan.

“I know it wasn’t just you Felix, I am just saying that NO one has thought about this stuff!” Chan pointed out aggressively. Felix bought his feet up to get comfortable.

“And because you are thinking about it right now, it is everyone’s problem is it?” Felix argued back in English.

“Well, it was your problem to begin with! Then mine!” Chan argued as he sat forward.

“What? The baby is a problem for you Chris? Well, you should have thought of that before fucking me huh?” Felix picked up his phone to try and signal the end of the conversation. Chan wasn’t having it.

“Sorry if I assumed you took birth control! Felix! Why didn’t you huh?”

“Why is it solely MY responsibility? Wear a condom ass hole!” Felix pulled the blanket from the back of the couch over himself. Chan huffed.

“You never said you could get pregnant!”

“Do you ask everyone you meet if THEY can!? Wouldn’t it just be safer to assume everybody can?” Felix laid flat now and Chan got more agitated that the younger was no longer even looking at him.

“That isn’t even the point! The point is it has happened, why aren’t you thinking about any of this stuff? We need nappies, we need clothes, we need a place for them to live!” Chan moved closer and Felix shuffled up away from him. Chan frowned.

“How about YOU think about some of this stuff and _I_ will think about how my body will never be the same, how I will have a massive scar on my body for the rest of my life, how _I_ will be shamed if anyone found out, how _I_ will have to carry the kid for months. Should I go on!?” Felix had raised his head to ask the last part. Chan looked saddened as his eyes flicked over Felix. He wanted to comfort him but he was the bad guy right now.

Han was washing some spoons when he heard Felix worries about his body. Han looked down then to Minho who was stirring some broth. “Hyung?” Han asked softly. Minho hummed. “How do you feel about me having a big scar?”

“Hmmmm!” Minho addressed him positively. “It’s fine, we can add some more and call them tiger stripes.” Minho said and picked up a knife playfully. Han pouted.

“Ya! Hyung has a point. We never thought about these things before.” Han said softly.

“Hanna.” Minho looked to Han with a small smile. “Worrying is not good for the baby. How do I know? I looked it up. I also know the scar will be bellow your pelvis line so no one will see it, also, that you will have pain in your belly button when you go into labour and that you can technically breast feed for the first few days because you will produce a small amount of stuff which is particularly good for the baby. I know you need to eat 4 times per day, that your pregnancy will probably be 8 months not 9 and that no matter what stroller, cot, clothes or toys they have, no matter where we live or how we announce it, I know your family will support you, I know mine will support me and that everything will be ok.”

“How do you know?” Han asked with a small laugh.

“Because I will make it ok.” Minho smiled again. Han had to look away. It was too genuine.

“Ah. This is why they call you Lee Know.” Han laughed to himself and Minho blinked at him in silent rage.

***

Han and Felix were next to each other on the couch. Felix had just gotten back from a check up on his bump. That was what it was called now. Hans was ‘Bol’ like the word for ‘cheeks’ because Han’s was slightly bigger… Like his cheeks. Felix and Han were currently playing spot the difference with their shirts up and bellies pushed forward.

“No! Mine is perfect!” Han defended when Felix said the curve was weird.

“No, the doctor said mine was perfect! Yours is too pointy!” Felix said and started laughing. Han started laughing too and pushed the younger.

“Wae? Wae?” Han asked as they laughed. Minho was currently grocery shopping and Chan was picking up and order. Chan had gotten his Australian licence transferred to Korea and bought a Kia SUV. He was immensely proud when he showed Felix who immediately started calling it a ‘Dad’ car. Chan had hugged him and said it was because he WAS a dad.

Changbin and Hyunjin had moved into an apartment in the block behind them. Seungmin was moving in there too but was at his parents for a while. Jeongin was staying with the two families as he could have a room to himself, he just had to lean out the ‘storeroom’ or the ‘clothes room’ as it actually was. Once Hyunjin and Changbin left, there was a lot less in there. Felix and Han now had the most clothes but more space because it was only 2 in a room now. For longevity, it was decided that the babies would share a room.

The bunk beds are gone, Hyunjin took one for him and Seungmin and Chan had invested in some real furniture for them. Minho had gotten his mother to recommend some matching sets for him and Han and ordered some at a MASSIVE discount from his father.

The house looked nice.

The fridges were gone. Chan fixed the curtain in the kitchen; the gym equipment went with Changbin and the house looked like a home. A cleaner came in once per week. She was old. She was a long-time friend of JYPE and used to clean their old building.

Having a cleaner come around was a part of the agreement with the company. Chan, Minho, and Han went to that meeting. Felix couldn’t bring himself to do it.

The company was going to fine them for loss of income, but Hyunjin and Seungmin agreed to continue to work, 3racha also agreed to continue to make music. Changbin had said he would manage it solo as much as possible if needed. Then they tried to bring up getting a termination. It was something Han and Minho had talked about and said no to. They knew the subject would come up; Felix really didn’t want to be there for that.

3racha agreed to adjust the splitting of royalties for music they wrote for other JYPE artists during their ‘break’. They really were concerned for only money.

Then at the end of the meeting, JYP himself stayed back and asked the boys to stay while the others left. He started with expressing his disappointment in the pausing of their careers as he enjoyed their music. He then went on to address Han, he smiled and asked if he had thought of any names yet. Han was nervous to answer but Minho said no for him. JY asked Chan who said ‘Bilby or Opal’ for a girl and ‘Dawn or Hunter’ for a boy. Only after Chan spoke and JYP nodded with a small smile did Han feel brave enough to speak up.

“I had actually thought of one, but… I haven’t spoken to Hyung about it yet.” Han said and Min smiled. Their elder laughed and said perhaps Han needn’t call Minho Hyung anymore. Han laughed. He asked again about the name.

“Un-myeong” JYP smiled.

“Fate.”

Han and Felix where still laughing when the door opened and Minho arrived home.

“Appa!” Han called out and Minho froze with the bags. Han laughed again. His hair had grown out enough that it was now tied back in a small ponytail. Felix was still restraining his with a hair band.

“You don’t like being called Appa? Get used to it!” Han said as he struggled more than he would like to admit getting up. Minho smirked at him. Han glared.

“Isn’t calling me Appa what got us into this?” Minho asked casually as he continued to the kitchen. Felix snorted a laugh and Han turned red.

“No!” Han demanded.

“Ah! It was Oppa” Minho said and Han kicked him. Minho put the bags on the table and hugged Han as he opened one, then another, then another.

Felix took interest.

“Is there any snacks?” Han asked as he went to the fourth bag.

“I asked you if you wanted snacks, you said no, you complained about your weight.” Minho said and Han gawked at him.

“Ya! You are supposed to say I am still beautiful and buy chocolate for me anyway!” Han raised his voice. Minho smiled at him. Bare foot with Minho’s baggy dance pants and a large white shirt on. He was a mess. It was beautiful. “YA! Why are you smiling!?” Han stomped his foot.

“Its at the door.” Minho said with a chuckle and Han folded his arms.

“See? This was unnecessary wasn’t it? You just made me mad AND more work for you because you think you are funny huh?” Han said while trying to be serious. Minho fetched the snack bag from its hiding spot with a smile. Felix started putting things away. “That’s what I thought.” Han said with a glare as he took the bag from Minho. Felix stopped helping to inspect.

“Jelly!” Felix said excitedly.

The two took the bag to the couch and returned to lounging while they ate. Han filled his cheeks with Oreo’s and Felix slurped on Jellies. Han was wobbling his feet happily on the coffee table as he ate.

“Hanna.” Minho called after a few minutes.

“What?” Han said dramatically.

“Come and help with dinner.” Minho called and Han groaned loudly.

“No! I’m pregnant.” Han called back and tried one of the Jellies when it was offered.

“Hanna! You need to help at least. You sat all day, it’s not good for you. What if I wasn’t here? You would have to do it all yourself.” Han swallowed the jelly with a glare and dropped his feet from the table.

“If you weren’t here, I wouldn’t be pregnant!” Han shouted as he dragged his feet to the kitchen. Packet of Oreos in hand.

Felix turned on frozen and could hear the two singing in the kitchen.

Half through the movie, Chan returned home. Dropping his car keys by the door. Felix could hear him struggling with a box though. Felix rolled off the couch and headed to help. Chan jumped when he saw him silently arrive. Felix took the pile of smaller boxes off the top and took them to the coffee table. Chan followed and dropped the bigger one. Felix smiled at him as he was wrapped up in a hug.

Felix huffed when Chan held on too long.

“What’s wrong?” Felix laughed and Chan sighed.

“We are about to build a cot.” Chan said and held Felix tighter. “I just want to remember this when the screws don’t fit and I put the wrong side on.” Chan smiled and Felix laughed.

“Oh, like in the movies. Then we pay someone else to do it?” Felix laughed.

“Yeah… Just like that.” Chan said with a sigh and swayed them a little.

“I’m sorry we aren’t in Australia.” Chan said quietly and kissed the top of Felix head. Felix pulled back but Chan held on.

“Chan. I love Korea. I’m sorry we can’t be with family but that isn’t forever you know.” Felix smiled and peppered kisses on Chan’s shoulder. Chan groaned and let Felix pull away slowly.

“That isn’t the only reason.” Chan smiled and fixed his muscle tee before taking Felix hand. “If I don’t ask now, I probably won’t. I don’t know.” Chan paused and Felix bopped in place waiting. “I should do this properly, right?” Chan smirked and dropped to one knee with out breaking eye contact.

“Ok. Felix. We haven’t had the best start… Traditionally. I suppose. But we came from the same city, to the same company, chasing the same dream and ended up on the same team and now, we live in the same house… How about sharing the same name?” Chan pulled out a simple black box with some script on it and opened it.

It was a plain silver band with ‘always find me’ etched in Korean. It took Felix a moment to read it then his bottom lip poked out.

“Chan.”

“I know we can’t here, but one day, when we go back to Sydney, maybe we can get married there? Have a wedding at Port, go for a honeymoon to the gold coast or something?”

“Channie.” Felix whispered.

“I know you aren’t a damsel that needs to be made honest or anything, but I want you to know how committed I am to making this whole thing work the whole way, the band, the baby… Us?”

Felix dropped down and wrapped Chan in a hug. Chan held him tightly.

“Yeah.” Felix said softly.

“Really?” Chan asked excitedly.

Felix sniffled.

“Yeah.”

Chan stood up excitedly and held Felix off the ground. The younger squeaked but let himself be swayed about.

“Ya! Restart the movie, Minho made dumplings.” Han said as he came back in the room with a tray. Han took in the sight of the wide smiling boys and scoffed. “Well, if you would rather take your evening to the bedroom, then more for me!”

“Hanna!” Felix said excitedly and grabbed the box to hold out.

Han looked at it as he took a bite. He froze.

Silence for a moment… Then, “YA! MINHO-AH!” Han stomped back into the kitchen. Felix laughed and asked Chan if he can wear the ring, Chan took the box back and asked for Felix hand.

“MINHO! THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED AND EVERYTHING! YA! FELIX GOT A RING AND I GOT DUMPLINGS!?”

“Fits perfectly.” Felix noted and Chan smiled as he set the ring into place.

“YOU WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE DUMPLINGS?”

“Like us.” Chan said and lent in for a kiss.

“DON’T BE STUPID! OF COURSE I WANT THE DUMPLINGS! I ALSO WANT THE RING!”

Felix smiled into the kisses as did Chan.

“WELL EAT YOUR DUMPLINGS! IT’S NOT EVEN LEGAL HERE!”

“I love you. I don’t say it enough. I am going to say it more. I love you.” Chan said and kissed him again.

“WE CAN GO SOMEWHERE ELSE AND DO IT! OR AT LEAST GET ENGAGED!”

“I love you too Channie.” Felix smiled.

“WE CAN’T NOW! IT’S NOT THE SAME IF YOU DEMAND IT!”

“HAVE YOU EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT IT!?”

“Wanna eat, or do you wanna build a cot?” Chan asked and Felix smirked.

“OF COURSE! STOP RUINING IT!”

“Hmmm. How about we go lay down?” Felix suggested and Chan looked confused.

“I’M SORRY! I AM SO HUNGRY!”

“Lay down?”

“THEN EAT THE STUPID DUMPLINGS AND STOP SHOUTING!”

Felix didn’t answer him but took his hand to lead the way to their room.

“FINE! I LOVE YOU!”

“I LOVE YOU TOO!”

Han laughed first then Minho. They can’t even argue normally.

Felix head was between the pillows in the middle of the bed. His gasps where loud and ragged, it had been thirty minutes of teasing touches and kissing before they finally got to it. Chan was over him, his legs around Chans middle and pulling them together. It was slow but powerful movements that kept Felix on edge. Chan was in bliss, the heat between them felt perfect and his mind was reeling with the thought of having this for the rest of his life.

Chan knew modern marriage wasn’t this serious, divorce was common and the idea of forever is all but gone, but he felt this was genuinely different. Felix was beautiful. He was carrying his child. Their love had made a family.

They had only been together for a year when this happened but since they first met, Chan knew he felt this way. His friends told him it was puppy love, immature love, that it wouldn’t last so don’t try. Chan thought Felix was too young. That’s why he called him a brother. He wanted to be close to him.

But… He never felt like a brother.

Then over the years, Felix had come out of his shell. Just like the first night they kissed, they had been dancing sillily at a show under cover in the US. And in the moment, Chan knew his feelings would never die.

Felix didn’t realise how strong his own feelings were until that moment on the dance floor and all he wanted was to be held by the elder. Holding lead to kissing, kissing lead to touching and touching lead to this and while Felix never thought himself to be gay, he thinks it is now a question he doesn’t need answered. He is happy. He loves this. How Chan makes him feel. Protected. Safe. Loved. Beautiful.

Felix mewled as Chan shifted. It was just right.

His arms flung out to the sides over the pillows as his chest struggled to rise and fall. Chan kept the angle and bent forward to kiss Felix. Felix legs squeezed Chan. His thighs shook.

Chan shifted his weight to one knee and held himself with one hand to move the other to support Felix hips.

“Chaaana” Felix whined.

Chan kissed him again and moved his knees up to support Felix. He wasn’t able to move as much but Felix took over, shifted his weight down and ground over Chan while he stayed in deep. Chan had to lift his head up and take deep breaths. Being sheathed in Lix was heaven, having him move his hips like this bought him over the edge too quickly.

“Lix.” Chan grunted and sat back. He held the tops of Felix thighs to keep him close and matched his movements. Felix was close too.

Chan smoothed his hand up the underside of his length, against Felix stomach and Lix shivered. Chan kept his hand on the head and let Felix grind against it while he ground on Chan’s cock. Felix bucked into the hand and lost the rhythm they had made. Frustrated, Felix tried to sit up and properly ride Chan, but the elder took over and circled his hips. Chan was too close to cumming to deal with this gorgeous boy bouncing in his lap.

Chan fucked forwards roughly, jolting puffs of air out of Felix. He was going to lose it. Chan rubbed his hand up and down steadily along Felix dick making the younger’s toes curl and hands clench.

Felix was tightening and Chan groaned as he kept fucking through the sensitivity and felt genuinely sorry for every other man never being able to feel this. He could cum now with out moving, Felix insides were milking it from him. He breathed heavily and moved on auto pilot to bring Felix over the edge. He was there. He was cumming. His cock was twitching violently inside Felix. Felix grabbed at him, he tossed his head, his stomach tightened. He was going to cum. Chan just needed to keep going.

Chan lost his rhythm, he was cumming properly now. Felix grabbed the headboard, is hips shook and he clenched around Chan over and over on each perfect movement from the elder until he finally released. Chan was still cumming when Felix cried out his relief but kept going to make it last

Until Felix grabbed Chans wrist, until his dick stopped twitching in Felix, until Felix cries stopped. Chan kept fucking him.

Once Felix was boneless, Chan pulled out, he pulled Felix on top of him and laid on his back. They stayed like that to catch their breath.

Chan slid a hand down. He loved to feel how Felix hole kept pulsing after sex. Felix squirmed and Chan laughed.

“Chan.” Felix complained and moved the elders hand back up.

“Ok, I’ll stop.” Chan kissed his head. “Anything for my fiancé.”

Felix nuzzled Chan and cuddled into him more.

“I like that.”

“Kiss me”

Han had fallen asleep in a dumpling coma on Minho’s lap. Minho played with his hair while he rested and smiled fondly. He knew Chan was going to propose tonight.

Chan had gotten the idea from him.

Since they have committed to this family idea, the ease that comes between Minho and Han has just become a permanent thing. Not something that becomes apparent occasionally. Minho was struggling to accept this carefree, funny, cute little man wanted to be with him. Had always hoped but now.

Early on they discussed never putting a label on themselves. They enjoyed each other’s company. They found comfort with one another. They never REALLY fought. Just play fights. They were attracted to each other. Minho wanted to look after him. Han wanted to do the same. The only thing they couldn’t do with each other was have an open discussion about their ‘relationship’.

They were always still very independent. But rather their time together.

Minho didn’t know how to say, ‘I genuinely love you’ or ‘I hate when you cry’ or worse, ‘I only ever want you to be happy.’ Just like Han couldn’t say ‘You are the only person I want to be with’ or ‘I want to grow old together’.

They tried. They really did. But one of them always made a joke or cringed and the tone would change.

Minho could only trust the actions he saw. The choices they made.

They chose not to abort. They chose to share a bed. They chose to raise a child. Together. None of those things were ever discussed. Just mutually agreed upon.

Why?

Minho never wanted to show his weakness. What he might be scared of. Han never wanted Minho to worry or see his concerns. Their dynamic was light and playful. Neither wanted to ruin that.

Minho considered that perhaps it’s time to show Han a little weakness. He could propose. He could. They were already doing it and the way Han shouted about it tonight, even though it was playful, surely that meant it was what he wanted too?

Minho picked up his phone and opened the tab on his browser that say in the cart option of a jewellery store. Minho pressed ‘confirm’ and closed the phone.

The other issue he had was that he never saw himself as the ‘butch’ one in the relationship. They never took on that role. Han was loud, confident, and worked hard to make the money he has. Minho was… a support? He was a part of the team but his job was nothing like Han’s.

Even in the bedroom… It was 50/50. What are the odds Han got pregnant?

What the hell are gender roles anyway?

Han is still a male.

It was all too much for Minho to consider. He just forgets about it.

Han is perfect.

That is all that matters.

During this thought, Han’s big eyes blink open.

He rolls over and shuts them again. Minho keeps playing with his hair and smiles.

“Into the unknoooowwwwn.” Han sings weakly. Minho laughs.

“Ah… I love you Minho.” Han says softly. Minho hums.

Han pokes his ribs.

“Ya… I love you too.” Minho laughs.

Once Han is asleep again, Minho carries him to bed.

Han still uses his pig pillow to cuddle. Then Minho cuddles him. Sometimes Minho uses the pig and Han hugs him… But not often.

It makes Minho nervous.

That is something else he can’t say.

Han settles into bed and cuddles the pig. Minho lays next to him and watches him for a few moments. Minho thinks about how he should ask Han. Surely at Namsan tower.

Han began to move again. Minho put a handout to soothe his side, But Han keeps shuffling backwards towards him. Minho looked on confused.

Once Han was settled into place against Minho’s front, Han huffed. “If you aren’t going to come to me, I will come to you.” Han said in sleepy defiance. Minho put his arm around him and sighed.

“So needy.”

Han slapped him weakly.

***

True to form, all of the furniture has arrived and has been sitting in the decided nursery for over a month. Felix and Chan had put the cot together. It took 2 days.

A change table arrived and was in it’s packaging, another arrived for Han and Minho in pieces. Their things almost exclusively came from Ikea. Felix and Chan’s from Australian stores. They really spent too much. Minho argued that they would only need it for a year or two then they would need beds.

Chan went to every check up with Felix. He filmed it every time there was a scan and captured the audio of the heartbeat. Felix face timed their families and shared pictures on his belly growth. They had a small party for their friends at their house to celebrate their engagement. It was tracking along nicely. Chan went to the studio with Changbin to work on tracks. Felix played video games. So not much had changed.

For Han and Minho on the other hand, everything had changed. Not in a bad way of course, they spent all of their time together, they cuddled on the couch, cooked, and ate together and laughed at the little things. That was normal yes, but the way they could both freely act in love and accept love with out the jokes or sarcastic remarks was new. There was no denial or breaking away from each other with a laugh as if it were all a joke. It was nice, though some part of Minho expected it to happen still. He would think of what his response would be if Han laughed at the way he hugged him. How he should react if Han slapped his hand away. How he would play it off if Han rejected his kiss.

It took up a lot of Minho’s mind. It held him back from it.

Han on the other hand, worried when Minho might get over the touching and cuddling. He worried Minho was only putting up with his clinginess because of the pregnancy and that he would get over it and want space. Han tried to give him space sometimes, but Minho always asked him to join and Han never wanted to say no.

Han knew he should be more worried about the baby. Chan and Felix basically only talked about the baby or the nursery or their pregnancy. Minho and Han on the other hand… They were still trying to figure ‘them’ out.

It was 10 pm when Han wanted to find Minho. It was one of those days Han wanted to give Minho some space. Han tried to hide away with Felix while Chan was in the studio and let Minho have the apartment to roam in.

When Chan came home, Han was desperate to trade his cuddling with Felix to cuddling with Minho.

Han looked in their room, in the kitchen and bathroom and loungeroom but he was nowhere. Han checked the front door, Minho’s bag and shoes were still there. Han looked to the Nursery and sure enough, there Minho was. A mess of open boxes around him, hair pinned into an apple fountain and various baby items built.

A rocker, a basinet, and a chest of draws that matched the semi build change table. Han felt his eyes prickle. Why today? Why was he doing this without Han?

“Minho.” Han said softly. Min hummed and continued to build. Han shuffled forwards and dropped to his knees to weakly pick-up bits of plastic. “Why are you in here.” Han asked softly.

“Just getting this out of the way.” Minho said and flipped the table over to attach another part.

“Are you…”

“Hungry? I ate. I made ramen for you.” Minho said and checked the instructions.

Han gnawed on his bottom lip as he thought.

“Why are you building this now?” Han asked and Minho shrugged.

“I didn’t have anything else to do.” Minho said. Han teared up.

“Hyung, I was giving you space, not making you do this on your own.” Minho paused to look at Han and blink.

“Why… I’m not…” Min shook his head, “Hanna… Why do you think I need space?”

Han wiped his eyes and shrugged. “I have been relying on you so much. I didn’t want you to get sick of me before the baby comes.” Han tried to joke but his demeanour and words concerned Minho too much now for him to laugh.

“I know you are trying to make a joke Han, but I need to know if you really feel that way.” Minho asked and Han avoided his eyes as he nodded.

“Hanna.” Minho said and set his tools down to scoot on his butt over to the smaller boy. Han shuffled on his knees to meet him. He lifted a leg and sat on one of Minho’s thighs as he was wrapped in a hug. Han wrapped his arms around Minho’s shoulders and rested his face against Minho’s neck.

“Aigoo. Aigoo.” Minho cooed and rubbed Han’s back. “I don’t need space from you Han.” Minho said softly and thought about repeating it louder, but Han nodded against him.

They stayed like that for a moment before Minho started to let go. Han made to get off him, thinking he was standing up, only for Minho to lay back on the ground. Han smiled and straddled him fully, shuffling on his knees to sit on Min’s hips. Minho smiled up at him and rubbed his thighs. Han laughed and set his hands-on Minho’s belly.

“Good night.” Minho said and closed his eyes.

“No, can’t sleep, we need to watch kingdom.” Han complained and Minho smiled again. He lifted his legs to plant his feet on the floor, making Han slide forward into the wells of his hips. Minho let his hands slide up higher to Hans bum with a smirk.

“Ya,” Han laughed, “Ya, Minho. This is the kind of behaviour that will get us in trouble.” Han scaled and Minho lifted him with his hips briefly.

“I don’t know how much more trouble we could be in from this kind of activity.” Han laughed and ran a hand over his belly. Minho watched with a smile.

Han noticed reached for one of Minho’s hands and put it on his stomach as well. Minho watched him move his hand around before putting it back. Minho shifted Han further up his body and put both of his hands on it. Han laughed and watched.

“You never felt it before.” Han said with a nervous chuckle. Minho hummed.

“I feel it while you sleep.” Minho said and it was almost too much for Han’s hormonal ass to handle.

“Why not when I’m awake?” Han asked shyly as Minho started gently massaging the middle.

“I don’t want you to get annoyed.” Minho said mindlessly as he watched his hand rise and fall with Han’s breathing.

Suddenly, Han’s hand slapped his away. Minho panicked and pulled his hands back.

“I am not going to get annoyed with you touching me!” Han complained and pulled Minho’s hands back to his belly. Minho shook his head and held either side of the bump, he used his thumbs to stroke the skin.

It was quiet for a moment.

“Why are we so bad at this.” Han asked and Minho looked to him confused. “We are going to be parents together and I still can’t figure you out.” Han put his hands over Minho’s to hold.

“What has you confused?” Minho asked with a laugh. It was his turn to try and make it a joke. Han just settled into his lap some more and played with Minho’s fingers.

“I don’t know what you want. I don’t know how I can help. I don’t know if you are with me because you think you have to now or because you want to. I just. I don’t know.” Han said in a small voice. Minho hummed understandingly and waited a beat before speaking.

“Would you believe me if I told you…” Minho had to stop and laugh, “That you… You are all I want?”

Han frowned. “Not if you laugh about it.”

“Well, you are just as hard Hanna. You are so far out of my league, It’s only a matter of time before- “

“Out of your league?” Han interrupted. “Me?” Han asked in disbelief.

“Hmm… Yes. Hanna. I know you don’t see it, but you are. I am selfish for keeping you from the world.” Minho said sincerely and Han smacked him playfully.

“Shut up.”

“Seriously, the day you said that you want to keep the baby, and asked me if we could raise it, was the happiest day of my life. It’s selfish for me to be so happy that I can keep you to myself but I am.” Minho said and sat up on his elbows.

Han looked shocked. His mouth pulled into a pursed expression.

“Minho, why don’t you talk this sweet all the time?” Han asked and Minho poked Hans ribs.

“Because you would get used to it.” Minho smiled. He sat up fully now and struggled backwards until he was leaning against the wall, Han still on him and laughing at the elder’s struggle.

“Smooth.” Han laughed. Minho settled back and sighed. Han reached forward and grabbed his face. Minho looked at him. His big eyes flicked back and forth between Minho’s. His cute mouth hung open a little, so his hamster features showed. Minho smirked.

“Why are you so handsome?” Han asked and Minho turned his head away with a laugh. “Seriously! It doesn’t seem right.” Minho shook his head. “I’m worried that the baby might look like me.” Han said and Minho laughed.

“I would love them more.” Minho said through a smile and Han smirked.

“Does that mean you love me?” The younger asked and Minho rolled his eyes and dramatically dropped his head back.

“Duh!”

“Well tell me, not as a joke.” Han said and moved his face closer.

Minho looked back to him.

“You say it first.”

“I love you, Minho.” Han said and smiled. Minho nodded.

“I love you too, Jisung.” Minho nodded again and laughed. Han smiled wide and shuffled closer.

“Can we kiss? Like, is that something we can just do now?” Han asked and Minho looked to his lips.

“You can decide.” Minho answered.

Han didn’t say anything else, but with a wide smile he leant forward and kissed the elder.

Minho put his hands on Han’s lower back and kissed him too.

Minho’s heart was skipping. They have kissed countless times, either a peck while cooking dinner, or messy making out during sex… But never like this. Soft and long. Meaningful.

Loving.

Han hummed into the kiss and shuffled forward more, Minho held his behind and tilted his head, Han took that as a signal to keep going. It was intimate. Pure. Not cheeky or funny. Not hot and heavy.

Han pulled back to lick his lips, Minho complained and chased him. Han giggled, wrapped his arms around Minho’s head and kissed him again.

It continued for a good 5 minutes before Minho’s hands were gripping a little too hard and Han was shifting a little too much for it to be innocent anymore.

Han pulled away. His eyes darker and Minho looked dazed.

“I don’t want to ruin the moment, but…” Han started, Minho shook his head and pulled Han’s head to his chest.

Han could hear Minho’s heart racing. But he was making it clear it would not be progressing to the bedroom. Han relaxed against the elder and wrapped his arms loosely around his waist while he listened to the heartbeat under him slow steadily.

“I love you.” Han said softly.

“I love you too.” Minho whispered and patted Han’s head.

“I mean it.” Han added.

“Me too.” Minho said against Han’s hair.

“Is this weird?” Han asked. “It doesn’t feel weird.”

“Not weird. Surreal.”

“Oh… Good way to put it.”

Han sat back and stared at the furniture around them.

“Do you know we are going to be parents?” Han asked and Minho nodded.

“Do you know you are cute?” Minho asked and Han gawked.

“Minho!”

“I thought we were saying obvious things?” Minho smiled and Han smacked him.

“I don’t want to be cute!” Han complained.

“Well, you are so…” Minho shrugged, and Han pouted. “What do you want to be then?”

“Sexy.” Han said with out thinking. Minho smiled.

“You didn’t get pregnant by not being sexy.” Minho said non clamantly.

“Ah, Hyung finds me sexy?” Han asked with a wide smile and Minho looked at him with dangerous eyes that made Hans confidence faulter.

“Don’t test me.” Minho said and smacked Hans behind before pulling his knees up sharply, so their position was quickly made provocative.

“What if I want to test you?” Han asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Well, I suppose you can’t get pregnant twice.” Minho almost growled and Han held on to his shoulders as Minho rutted against him.

“Minho” Han squeaked, and Min leant forward to gently nip at Han’s neck. Han shook and Minho breathed out heat over his skin.

“See? Cute.” Minho said and sat back bonelessly with a laugh.

“YA!” Han shouted and tried to stand up. Minho held his wrist. “Now you are teasing me!” Han Huffed. Minho laughed again. “You never loved me!” Han said dramatically and Minho settled the younger back onto his lap, but Han was being a drama queen and folded his arms.

“Come on, let’s shower.” Minho said as he tried to pull one of Hans hands out to hold. Han was stubborn though.

“No. I will shower, and you can watch.” Han stood up and Minho smirked.

“I won’t say no.”

Han had gotten over it by the time they were in the bathroom though. Minho turned the shower on while Han undressed. Han stood in his underwear for a moment and considered his belly. Minho took his own shirt off and came up behind Han to hold his tummy. Han lent on him and Minho smiled. He told Han they looked like they were in a photo shoot and Han suggested they get one done. Minho blinked but told him he could if he wanted. Han had to tell him he was joking. But then considered taking some photos with Felix or something to remember.

Once they stepped into the shower, Minho took Hans hand and lead him in a slow dance. Han had laughed but Minho continued. Minho spun Han halfway and held his back against him. Han rested his head back onto Minho’s shoulder and closed his eyes as they swayed.

Minho started by slowly kissing Han’s neck. Then sliding his hands to his hips and holding them flush together. Han felt him getting turned on and held onto Minho’s hands while he kissed the nape of his neck.

Han was guided forward with little steps until he was against the glass wall. Han rested his elbows on the glass and his head against his fore arms while he was teased open. Han was open mouthed and breathing heavy. Minho had turned the warm spray towards them, so he didn’t get cold.

Han closed his eyes when Minho entered and bent his back down to open up for him. Minho kept it slow. He had one arm over Hans shoulder and chest, Minho’s taller body was leant to the right and his free arm was jerking Han slowly.

Han was breathing deep and steady. Minho guided the younger to look at him as he sped up slightly. Hans large eyes were damp and mouth wide. Minho watched the younger’s face in pleasure.

Minho was getting close when he leant forward to kiss Han. He took his lip between his and sucked gently. Repeating it over and over, never stopping his thrusts or strokes.

Han pulled back from the kiss to stare at Minho while he curled his back, and his knees shook.

Minho slowed down again, and Han made the most beautiful sounds when the slow drag in and out bought him over the edge. Minho kissed him through it. Every shake and shiver until he was spent.

Han moved forward off Minho and grabbed the soap before facing the elder. Han kissed him and turned them so Minho’s back was against the glass wall now. Han kept kissing him as he used some soap to clean Minho’s privates and wash it away before dropping to his knees. Minho held the top of the glass with one hand and rubbed his thumb over Hans cheek with the other.

Han was not very experienced in this area but Minho was already so close that it wouldn’t take much.

The way Han wrapped his lips around him and slid back and forth was good enough to make Minho buck and cum in his mouth. It pooled on Hans tongue at first before the younger sat back and let Minho keep cumming over his face. Minho almost couldn’t look; it was too sinful to see Han like that.

When he was done, Minho took Han’s hand that was on his hip and pulled the other up. Han spat Minho’s load out towards to drain as he stood and Minho used his thumbs to collect the rest of Hans face and rinsed it off his hands.

“See? You ARE sexy.” Minho said and laughed when Han sulked.

“I see how it is, I have to let you cum on my face before I can be sexy.” Han let Minho start to wash him.

“Hmm… Yes, but I wouldn’t go out like that.” Minho kissed Hans cheek and washed his back.

“You go out looking sexy though.” Han said softly and Minho smiled.

“I was born that way.”

“And I wasn’t?” Han sounded insulted.

“Hmm!” Minho hummed, “No, you were born cute.”

“Ya!”

***

Minho held Hans hand to help him get into the van. It was time for the last scan before he was admitted to hospital. Hyunjin was doing a fan meet today so all stay’s eyes would be off them. Han couldn’t hide the bump anymore. If he stood exactly right, maybe, but Han was… Let’s say dramatic about it.

Han waddled. He let his spine sag and the bump poked through his open jackets. Minho didn’t mean to waddle along with him but he did. Now there was the two of them waddling to the car, Minho carried their bags and Han munching on a chocolate bar. Han’s appetite this past week had been out of hand too. He was worried about putting on weight but Minho told him that was something he could worry about when he was no longer carrying a human in his guts. Han had hugged him and taken another banana milk back to the couch.

Once Han was seated, Min put the bags in and sat next to the boy. Their manager was driving them, to a different clinic today and fans had begun to spot Chans car. It’s not a big issue, but Minho was too nervous to take them on his own. So here they were, boarding in their secure car park and heading to another secure car park to get out.

Han held his belly on the drive, every movement was jiggling them and the feet were uncomfortably pushed against his ribs. Minho tried to help and spoke to his belly to be nice. It made Han laugh but not anything practical.

Once out of the van, Han and Minho were escorted to the emergency exit and taken a back way into the clinic. They never saw the front desk or waiting room, rather they were taken right to the examination area. Han waddled quickly to the exam bed and settled onto it. He told Minho they were MADE for his comfort. Minho set their bags down and pulled out a book they had kept all of their note in. Han played on his phone while Minho looked over the questions he had.

When the doctor came, she set up for the scan and made small talk with the two. Minho asked a few questions and jotted down the answers. The doctor began poking and pushing at Han’s stomach that made him wince and complain. She took some notes and said she was going to get another professional to come and have a look. Minho began to panic.

Once the doctor left the room, Minho put his book down and went to Han. He patted his head and rubbed the bump gently. Han didn’t seem too worried; he just had a look of discomfort.

2 other doctors came in and watched the pushing being repeated. Han stared at Minho through the pain and Min smiled weakly, trying not to show worry.

“It could be, get a test done and worst-case scenario, we go in early.” The male doctor said to the original physician.

The other two were about to leave when Minho spoke up.

“How soon? What is it?” He asked softly.

“Oh, Han might have an infection in his pancreas, if he does, we just need to get bubby out.” The male said before leaving. Minho wasn’t done asking questions. He turned back to their attending doctor.

“What is the infection? Is it dangerous?” He asked.

“It can be, but if Jisung hasn’t been vomiting or any fever than it would be fine. The pain in his upper abdomen is usually related to something pancreatic. He could have developed diabetes and with out treatment, caused an infection. It is what is most likely, but we will check. In the meantime, if any fever or vomit starts, just head to the hospital ok?”

“Diabetes? How could you not have picked it up?” Minho asked. It sounded accusing.

“Male pregnancies usually don’t develop it. It is not something we test for regularly. If he has it, it can be managed, please don’t worry too much.”

“Isn’t it too early for the baby to come? It’s only like, 7 and a half months.” Han asked and the doctor smiled to him.

“Babies can be born a lot earlier. It will be ok. It is straight forward birthing procedures for males, there is minimal risk of harm to the baby.” The doctor smiled and Minho pulled a face.

“What about to Han?”

“I’m tough!” Han said with a smirk.

“No. No you’re not.” Minho blinked and Han huffed.

“Jisung will be fine, it is something that can be managed but just in case, lets also get your birthing plan out of the way so it is sorted if you need to go in early.” The doctor pulled out some forms and assisted Han to sit up.

“Firstly, which hospital?”

“Our Hospital… In Gimpo.” Han said and Minho nodded.

“Gimpo?”

“It’s near my family.” Minho added, “And away from the city.”

“Are you set on that?” She asked and Minho checked with Han.

“Yes.”

“Well, I might suggest you heading that way sooner rather than later. If there was an emergency and you weren’t nearby, you would need to go to one closer and there would be no guarantee of you plan or privacy being met.”

“How soon?” Min asked.

“Today.”

“So, you anticipate there being an emergency?” Han looked scared when he asked and she shook her head.

“No, but I anticipate you needing things to go as closely to plan as possible. And if that involves an emergency admission, you need to be close by.” Han nodded and Minho pulled out his phone to begin texting his mother.

They created the rest of the birthing plan. Essentially, Han would go in at night, the procedure would take 1 hour and Han elected to be awake for it. Minho would be in the room and they would be staying in a private suite for 2 days then heading back to Cheongdam where outreach would visit every 2 days until deemed fit for reduced visits.

Of course, if anything went wrong, they would adapt the plan on the fly, but essentially, they needed to get to Gimpo and begin planning with the hospital directly.

JYPE had already made arrangements with Our Hospital in Gimpo to ensure privacy and logistics of movements. But it was really up to the baby at this point when they were going to arrive.

Once they arrived home safely, Han went to start packing. Minho started calling people. Felix started freaking out.

Han had to explain the situation and Felix felt sick. It registered that they were going and he wasn’t going to be there when Han gave birth. Han tried to laugh it off as Felix might be going in the same day, but Felix was too hormonal for jokes.

Minho made plans with his mother and father for them to stay at their house. His mom would help look after Han and wanted to be there for the birth too. But then so did Han’s mother. Then Han’s brother also wanted to be there. But then so did Hyunjin and Seungmin. It was getting too much so they had to say no to everyone.

The last call Minho made as to Chan. Chan said he would come home right away. Minho was going to have to drive them out to Gimpo. Han didn’t have his licence and Minho only recently got his for this express purpose but that was a lot of pressure to drive your pregnant partner around. He hated it. Now he had no choice. Minho found the keys. Han had bought the car with his royalty money. It was a brand-new mini cooper. Minho had already fitted the baby seat as he only planned on driving for this reason.

Minho went to help Han pack. Only when they were done and Jisung went to find more snacks did Min think about stuff for the baby.

Han had bought a baby backpack online… But where was it?

Minho asked Han and Felix where it might be but neither knew. Han went to help Minho look. They were going through some of the opened boxes in the babies’ room and Han said he would go and look in their room.

Minho was searching for a few minutes when he found the dark grey bag. Minho called out to Han but he heard a bang instead.

Minho stopped.

He thought for half a second.

Then he ran.

Minho was in their bedroom so fast, Felix got whiplash.

Han was on the floor of course, a stool tipped over next to him. Han looked up with worry when Minho entered but his worry was nothing compared to the distress Minho presented with.

“Han!” Minho said as he searched for an explanation.

“I’m ok.” Han said innocently but Minho was in fight or flight mode and stormed over to pick the younger up.

“No, you’re not, you just fell! What were you thinking Jisung!?” Minho said angrily and Han was taken aback. Once he was on his feet, he looked confused.

“I didn’t mean it Hy-,”

“I hope not! Go and sit down! Don’t do anything stupid.” Minho said fiercely and Han looked down as he walked past Felix to sit on the couch.

Felix followed quietly and just sat next to him while Minho went back into the babies room.

Han looked out the window with his hands in his lap. Felix wanted to ask him if he was ok but that would be stupid.

Minho on the other hand, froze once he was back in the nursery and let the anxiety hit him. His hands shook and his heart raced. For a moment, just a moment, he saw his world fall down around him.

Minho tried to look for clothes.

He tried to find the nappies.

Minho knew there was bottles somewhere but he couldn’t do it.

Minho’s eyes blurred and he tried to stop his chin from shaking.

Minho heard Chan arrive home.

Min tried to breath deeply. He knew Han would be upset with how Minho yelled but he couldn’t function right now. He needed to hug Han. He just yelled at him. He couldn’t go to him for comfort.

He heard Felix give Chan a kiss and Minho’s heart broke that Han was upset right now and Felix was getting a hug. Minho stormed out of the room and looked to the couch where Han was. He paced over and Jisung looked mildly worried. Chan had read the room and knew they had fought so was in protective mode and ready to fight if need be.

But Minho just stopped in front of Han. Bent forward and hugged him. Han was confused but Minho got to his knees and rested his head on Jisung belly with his eyes closed while just a few tears made their way out.

Jisung slowly put a hand on Minho’s head and they sat there like that for the longest time. Long enough for Chan and Felix to go to their room and the sky to turn bright orange with the sunset.

“I’m sorry.” Han said softly and Minho shook his head.

“No. I’m sorry.” Minho said with a sniffle. “I got scared.”

“You? You never get scared.” Han said with a laugh.

“No horror movie, tall tower or creepy animal could ever make me feel fear like that.” Minho murmured. He dared not get off Jisung yet.

“Well, I am sorry.” Han said and grabbed for Minho’s arms to pull him up.

“Well, you should be.” Minho smiled as he let himself be pulled into a hug.

“we should get going though.” Han said as he looked outside. Minho nodded against him but didn’t move. Minho listened to Han’s heartbeat through his chest a few more times before he pulled away and helped Jisung up.

“Let’s pack for this kid.” Han said and waddled to the nursery.

Han didn’t mention what he had found in their closet.

***

Minho and Han had only been gone 3 days when Felix woke up in the middle of the night feeling like he was being stabbed. Felix reached out for Chan with a strong grip. Chan had barely opened his eyes when Felix started shouting.

“Chan! CHAN! FUCK!” Chan was up and searching for his pants.

“Now!? Is it happening? Felix?” Chan asked while jumping to keep balance while working his jeans up.

“FUCK! SOMETHING IS?” Felix groaned and held his stomach.

“Shit. OK. Hold on,” Chan half pulled on his shirt while dialling the hospital.

He worked his arm through the other sleeve when they picked up and was halfway to the nursery to grab the hospital bag.

“Hey, we have a VIP booking for a male birth… Yep… Yep, I’m Christopher, yes… I will drive him in… 5 Minutes… Pain yeah… Where will I meet him?... He will wait for us?... Ok, we will be about 20 minutes… Thank you.” Chan hung up the phone, grabbed the hospital bag and put it at the door. Chan heard Felix grunting in short, loud bursts.

“Fuck. Felix, Felix, you ok?” Chan asked as he came back into the room. He found some comfy pants and a large shirt for Lix. He got a hoodie and a hat to keep hit own hair back and a head band for the younger. Chan saw Felix trying to stand and came to help him. Chan sat him upright and knelt to hook the pants on Felix’s feet. Chan helped him stand and pulled the pants up before pulling the shirt over for him. Chan assisted with the hoodie and kissed Felix’s forehead as he pushed the hair band on.

Felix was breathing heavily and Chan barely registered his own automatic comforting words of ‘Good job baby, hang in there, you are doing great.’

Once he was up and dressed, they began their journey to the car. Once in the elevator, another heavy contraction hit and Felix clung to Chan as his legs gave way. Chan held him through it and had to hit the open doors button to stop the elevator from going back up until it passed and they could get to the car.

Felix knew his contractions would hit all at once and not work up to it like females did, but this was next levels of pain.

Chan got them to the hospital as efficiently as possible. Sure enough, there was a security guard waiting at the entrance in a buggy to lead them to the secure park. Chan followed him and once they were there, and getting out, another contraction hit and Chan had to stand at the door to the car holding Felix’s hands while he breathed through it.

The guard fetched a wheelchair and once it passed, Felix was helped into it and they headed up. In their private suite, there was already a nurse setting up an ultrasound machine and once Felix was on the bed, another nurse joined to start taking his vitals. The nurse with the machine began the scan. Another contraction hit and Felix squeezed Chan’s hand so hard for so long his fingers lost blood.

It passed and the scan continued. Felix was laying back on the bed, exhausted.

“Ok, Mr Lee, Baby is not in position yet. They are still turning. That’s the job of labour, to get baby facing the right way, so you will need to ride it out a bit longer and once baby is good to go, we will get you into the delivery room ok?” The nurse spoke and Felix just nodded.

“How long will it take?” Chan asked and the nurse told him it would be impossible to tell.

Chan pulled a seat up next to the bed. The nurse said they will check on the baby every half an hour until they are ready. Chan checked his watch.

4.30am.

This could be a long day.

Chan held Felix’s hand and watched as he tried to sleep.

Then it started again.

6am.

Felix was on his knees, elbows on the bed. He was crying as he rocked back and forth. Chan was rubbing his back. The contractions stayed a steady 5 minutes apart. Because he wasn’t going to push, they didn’t get closer. They just needed bubby to get into position. Baby was low enough now but not facing the right way. Felix was in agony.

7am.

Chan was on the bed with Felix huffing breaths out on his chest. His face was red and stained with tears. He was laying on his side on Chan with his knees up.

Bubby hadn’t moved much at all.

8am.

Felix was sitting up between Chans legs getting a massage and trying to breath through the pain. Bubby was almost there.

9am.

Felix was back to screaming and squeezing Chan. He was absolutely exhausted. He couldn’t hold it in anymore. Felix was lent back against Chan’s chest and his legs were shaking with the pain.

Bubby was being stubborn.

10am.

Chans arms were red and puffy from the squeezing and scratching. He didn’t complain though.

Not even when Felix told him he wished this never happened. They he was never going to do this again and that Chan can just fuck himself next time.

11am.

Baby was almost ready. Their legs were tucked up and head the right way. Just had to have it’s spine sitting down the bottom and they were good to go.

12pm.

Felix was told it was go time. The Nurses began to prepare the needles and spinal blocks. Chan was trying to zone out the chaos and focus on Felix who looked so so tired.

12.30pm.

Felix was taken into the delivery room.

Chan was led to the wash area to prepare and get into scrubs.

1pm.

Chan was next to Felix, patting his hair as he relaxed. Chan willed him not to sleep and wait for their baby. Felix was trying. All the younger could feel now was the push and pull of the surgery happening behind a modesty screen.

1.20pm.

Chan was called down to see. He peeked around the curtain and saw their baby being lifted from Felix. They appeared lifeless and Chan tried not to worry. The doctor held their baby and a nurse sucked stuff from its nose and mouth before a choked cry could be heard. Chan beamed.

The nurse put a clamp on the cord that attached bubby to Felix and guided Chan to hold the scissors to cut it.

Once cut loose, Baby was weighed and measured. Samples were taken for testing and Chan went back to Felix.

Chan had tears in his eyes. Felix looked so out of it. Chan patted his hair and kissed him.

“Wait baby, wait. They are here. Just wait.” Chan said and Felix continued to fight sleep.

In less than a minute, their baby was being deposited on Felix bare chest. Chan helped Felix get an arm up to hold them.

“It’s a girl.” Chan said in a whisper as he lent over to kiss Felix again and again, helping the younger hold the baby on his chest. She was crying. But they were both so happy.

1.40pm.

She was taken to be cleaned up. Chan was asked if he wanted to go with her or stay with Felix. Chan saw Felix had gone to sleep and decided to go with her.

2pm.

Chan was back in their private suite, his daughter in his arms and the most overwhelming love tearing his chest apart.

2.30pm.

Felix was bought back in. He had obviously been cleaned off and put into a clean bed. Chan instantly felt bad for leaving him but then looked to their baby and knew Felix would have told him to go.

Felix kept sleeping. Chan didn’t disturb him. He only wished he could hold both of them right now.

3pm.

Chan sent the first photos out.

First to his and Felix’s family.

Then the group chat.

Then the group called ‘Baby news’ that had their other close friends and family.

Chan turned his phone off then, knowing a bunch of calls would be coming in but he didn’t want to answer any of them. He just wanted to experience right now.

4pm.

Changbin arrived.

He came in quietly. He hugged Chan gently and kissed the baby on the head. He then gently kissed Felix on the hand and brushed his hair back.

Changbin sat on a chair near Chan and in silence they watched her sleep.

4.50pm.

Their manager arrived and hugged Chan tightly. He had tears in his eyes. He had bought flowers for them and set them next to Felix’s bed. Changbin went to get coffee for them all.

5pm.

Felix woke. Chan helped him sit up right and propped some pillows around him so he could hold their baby.

Felix cried silently while Chan kissed his head and rubbed his back and Changbin rubbed his leg for comfort. Chan kept repeating ‘You did so well. You did amazing. Look at how beautiful she is.”

5.30pm.

A nurse cam to demonstrate feeding for when she wakes. While she was there, Hyunjin and Jeongin arrived.

Once the demonstration was done, Hyunjin sat in the bed next to Felix and gently stroked her hair.

Jeongin took photos.

6pm.

She woke. Hyunjin, Jeongin and Changbin left to get some snacks. Chan helped Felix get her in a position to feed and prepared the bottle for her.

6.30pm.

She was still feeding. The others returned with Seungmin who had met them downstairs.

Chan took bubby to burp while Seungmin and Hyunjin sat with Felix to eat.

7.30pm.

Hyunjin and Changbin left. Seungmin stayed and help Felix with the first Nappy change. Jeongin went with Chan back home. Chan had to get some clothes for Felix.

8.30pm.

Chan returned and bought dinner. He and Felix ate while face timing their parents one at a time.

9pm.

Bubby woke and cried. Felix put her on his chest and she calmed quickly.

Chan made a bottle just in case but she didn’t have it.

10pm.

She woke again and Chan made a fresh bottle. Chan fed her this time while Felix spoke to the nurse about the drain attached to him from the surgery. Chan listened so he could help look after lix at home.

11pm.

Bubby was burped, another nappy change and was asleep again. Chan was in bed with Felix cuddling and they fell asleep like that.

2am.

Bubby woke. Chan made a bottle. Felix fed her. Felix continued to hold her while she slept. Chan took some photos.

3am.

Felix was asleep with Bubby. Chan took her and put her back to bed and tucked Felix in before also going to sleep.

4am.

Felix needed help going to the toilet. Chan did his best in his sleepy state. The light in the bathroom seemed far too bright though.

4.30am.

Chan was awoken by his phone buzzing. He picked it up to turn it off again then saw the caller.

Minho.

“Hey.” Chan answered groggily.

“Chan Hyung.” Minho never called him Hyung. “Hannie just went to hospital.” Chan took in the information for a moment.

“Labour?”

“No.”

***

“Han’s mother is on her way; I’ll meet her at your mothers house and we will be there if you need anything ok?” Changbin said through the speaker to a helpless Minho.

Minho wasn’t much of a talker, but the way he answered so brokenly in short sentences hurt everyone who heard them.

“Is Han ok?” Changbin asked. Seungmin who was with him looked on concerned.

“No.” Minho sniffled. Changbin didn’t want to ask about the baby.

Minho looked up when the doctor came back in. Han had been put under to stop the pain.

“We know it is looking grim right now, but please believe me, we are doing our best. For Jisung AND your child.”

“20% survival doesn’t sound like the best.” Minho grumbled and the doctor pursed her lips understandingly.

“I know Mr. Lee. It was a series of unfortunate events.”

Minho nodded. He knew it was no ones fault.

That pancreatic pain? Cyst on the uterine wall. The scans didn’t pick it up.

The fall? Agitated the cyst until it burst.

The burst cyst led to an infection, which lead to Han passing out. Which lead to another fall. Which lead to a rupture and pressure build up in the womb.

Han would not be able to go into labour for days.

Their child will die if they don’t get them out.

Han is not conscious to make a decision.

Babies heart rate and blood pressure is too low to sustain itself without intervention.

The baby is positioned wrong and will need to be cut out down the middle of Han’s torso. Doubling the healing time and leaving a massive scar.

Minho didn’t know what to do other than call Chan.

The hospital said Han’s mother can sign off on the surgery. But she was still on her way. Minho couldn’t decide for Han because they were not married.

If it became critical, they would prioritise the baby.

Minho just sat watching Han. He was trying to be ok with the idea that after today, he might not have one of them.

He couldn’t do it.

There was a consistent beep through the room as the monitors were on for baby. Minho watched with anxious eyes for every blip.

Changbin was taking Seungmin to his mother’s house and would be with her. Minho wanted her right now but needed to be the strong one. That was his job.

Han’s mother said she was coming as soon as she could.

Minho checked his phone. He hadn’t even registered the time when the heart monitor flashed red.

Minho panicked. He ran to the door to shout for help. There was nurses there in seconds.

“Can she not give verbal permission!?” Minho shouted as they worked to check for babies heartbeat.  
  


“Not for this type of surgery!” The nurse shouted back. Minho shook with anger. He held his head in his hands and tried to block out the sound of his family dying.

Minho looked up to see Han. Trying to keep the image of him in the front of his mind.

But all he saw was tubes getting shoved in his mouth and nose.

“What?!” Minho tried to question but was told to be quiet or leave. Minho cried unabashed now.

He really was losing everything.

He curled in on himself and cried. He watched oxygen tanks being bought in and fluid being attached to Jisung.

It felt like forever before the crowd started to dissipate and the steady blips came back… Only slower. Time was a blur.

Someone put their hand on Minho. He didn’t look.

“He is ok.” She said. Minho asked what happened through a croaky voice.

“He stopped breathing. It was just the infection.”

Minho sobbed.

“Save him.” Minho said with a sniffle.

“We are doing our best for both Mr—”

“No! Save HIM!” Minho demanded and finally looked at her.

“If I have to lose the baby, then I will. But save him!” Minho said firmly, his eyes not wavering.

“Are… Are you waving your right to protect the child in an emergency situation?” The nurse asked.

Minho said yes.

“That means… If he goes bad again… We will prioritise Jisung life at the risk of your child.”

“I know.”

“You are willing to lose your child to keep your boyfriend?” The nurse asked. Minho looked at her. She looked disgusted with him.

“Yes.” He said firmly.

“You are a sick man for making that call.” She shook her head.

“Because I made the call or because the call was made for a _boy”_ Minho glared at her.

“Men are not responsible enough to be given this ability to carry a child. Look at how this turned out! Now a child will have to die so some fool who thought he could care for an infant can live.”

“That is MY son you are talking about you wretched woman. Get the forms. I am here now.” Han’s mother walked in and set her handbag down. She shrugged off her coat and went to wrap Minho in a hug.

“How did you get here?” Minho cried.

“Lucky I guess.”

***

Han was taken into theatre. Minho couldn’t be in there. He WAS able to watch though.

Han was kept under general anaesthetic and covered in a surgery sheet. Minho watched the two doctors cut Han from his sternum to his pelvis. Minho looked at the baby’s heart monitor. It was starting to race. Minho shifted nervously.

Layers were being cut through and sealed as they cut down to the womb. Moving organs as they went. Minho had to take deep breaths. He wasn’t reconciling this well.

It was minutes later when Minho saw a small arm, then body, then head then legs.

His baby.

Him.

He was wiped over and face suctioned wit a small tube. Minho waited for a cry.

He was floppy. He was blue.

Minho covered his eyes.

Han’s mother rubbed his back. He sniffled and looked up. He wished he hadn’t.

One nurse had a mask over his face and was squeezing air in short puffs. Another was compressing his chest.

“Shhh, Shhhh.” Mrs. Han comforted Minho.

Minho blinked back tears and looked again through the pain.

They were suctioning his throat again. Then the mask was back on. Minho shook. His baby was blue.

Two compressions later a doctor came over. He picked the baby up. Minho knew it was to call the time of death.

Then the doctor held him upside down and compressed his back. A nurse bent down to suction his mouth. Something more came out. The baby was put back down and more oxygen. They hadn’t given up.

One more compression and Minho saw them turn him on his side and suction out vomit then he heard it. Finally.

He was crying.

Minho fell to his knees.

He just listened.

That beautiful sound.

His baby.

Their baby boy.

Minho basked in it for a moment.

But it wasn’t over.

The door opened next to him. He looked up.

“Mrs. Han, there has been a complication, we are afraid we cannot save the uterus. We can try, but there is no guarantee it will function and an exceedingly high chance it may cause health issues in the future.” The doctor said to Jisungs mother who looked to Minho. Minho shook his head.

“Take it out.” Min said quietly but certain.

“Mr. Lee, Jisung would not be able to carry any more children. We need you to understand that before we go ahead.” Minho nodded and Mrs. Han told them to go ahead. Minho turned and sat with his back against the wall under the window. He closed his eyes. He never wanted to go through this again either.

“Well, you can always carry the next one!” Mrs. Han said cheerfully. Minho looked to her with a small smile. That was where Jisung got his painful optimism from. “Oh. Minho… There is something for you.”

Minho looked to the door as it opened again. They where wheeling out a clear bassinette. Minho stood quickly and looked to the nurse for permission to come closer. The nurse smiled and nodded. Minho looked at his son.

“2.9 kg, 41 cm.” She said and smiled. Minho liked this nurse a lot more.

“Can…”

“Back at the room. You can come now if you want. Jisung will be here for another hour or so.”

“I can’t leave him.” Minho said. He looked panicked.

“I can go with baby. You stay sweetheart.” Mrs. Han said softly and Minho nodded. He didn’t ask before he bent down to touch his boy.

“Dadda loves you.” He said softly and the nurse smiled before wheeling him away. Mrs. Han followed.

Minho turned back to Jisung. He felt cold. He wanted to hold his baby but he couldn’t leave Han.

His partner was unconscious, his abdomen cut open and two doctors working to stitch him back together. Minho pulled his phone out. He started searching how long healing time will take. What will help with this kind of surgery and how to deal with the trauma of almost loosing a loved one.

***

Chan didn’t tell Felix about Han. He said he was going in to have his baby and Felix was so excited that they were one day apart.

Hyunjin and Jeongin stayed with Felix while Changbin and Seungmin went to Gimpo. They decided they would swap once Felix went home.

With how things were going, that was going to be pretty soon.

With pain medication, Felix could get around on his own and hold Bilby. Yijoon Bilby Bang. But they will call her Bilby.

Chan helped with lifting her and getting Felix upright.

Chan was in full Dad mode. All the attention and dedication he had directed towards his career was now all focused on his daughter.

Felix felt bad for how much Chan was doing but was reassured constantly with kisses.

Felix had passed the 24-hour monitoring and was given the all clear to head home the next day. Chan was staying with him at the hospital but went home that night just to make sure everything was ready to go. Hyunjin came over to help.

They had to put the air fryer away to fit the bottle warmer and steriliser on the bench. Hyunjin read through the instructions and prepared some bottles to store in the fridge, ready to be warmed and made up.

Chan finished the bassinette in his and Felix bedroom. He put the sheets on and grabbed too many blankets to set nearby. He lowered it and dropped the side that made it into a co-sleeper. Something they bought from Australia and had shipped. Chan also grabbed the little crochet Koala to put in there and some nappies to put by the bed. Felix had been changing her in bed with him to make it easier.

Hyunjin helped Chan hang the water colours in wooden frames of baby Australian animals in the nursery and changed the bed sheets to nice soft ones for Felix.

Chan had fallen asleep on the couch so Hyunjin left him. He told Felix and sent a picture of the new Dad and Felix agreed he should stay.

Chan woke at 5am though and rushed back up to the hospital. The nurses had taken Bilby so Felix could sleep. Chan cuddled up with him and closed his eyes again.

9am and Chan was finishing packing up their bags to take to the car. Their manager came to help. He was going to tail the car home for safety. He took the bags and Chan helped Felix while Hyunjin carried Bilby in the cradle insert.

The short travel had exhausted Felix again. Hyunjin helped Felix upstairs while Chan managed bubby. Once in their unit. Felix went to bed. Chan put bubby in the cot next to him and went back to the lounge room to just hug Hyunjin for the longest time.

***

Han had woken up at 8am. He was still connected to oxygen and antibiotics for the infection.

Doctors had come around while Minho slept and spoken to Han about the surgery. Minho had woken to Han crying and went to comfort him but was stopped by the doctors who reminded him of the scar.

They took the bandages off to assess the wound.

It looked angry. A nurse came to change the silver dressing before fitting the pressure bandage again. Han looked mortified at the scar until Minho said.

“You should see the other guy.” Han tired to laugh but it hurt and Minho shushed him by brushing his hair back.

Once Han was patched up, Minho bent to give him a kiss.

“How are you feeling?” Minho asked softly and Han sighed.

“Alright. I miss the Bol.” Han looked down over his flattening stomach and Minho squeezed his hand.

“He is fine. They took him last night so we could sleep.” Minho said and started fixing the blankets around Han.

“He?” Han asked with a smile and Minho looked up to him in shock. He forgot.

“Yeah.” Minho said and smiled.

“Well, HE is in big trouble. Busting open my stomach like an alien. Tearing out my uterus.” Han tried not to sound sad at the last part. Minho finished what he was doing in silence before looking back to Han with a sigh.

“I’m not glad it happened. But I am just saying, I don’t think I could see you go through that again.” Minho said quietly. Han sniffed back a tear and lifted his hand for Minho.

Minho took his hand and put his other on a chubby cheek. Minho smiled at him and Han made to move but flinched. He looked distressed. Minho frowned.

“Han! You can’t move!” Minho sighed. “Your whole abdominal wall was cut in half. Your muscles need to heal back together. That’s going to take a lot longer than 12 hours.”

“How long though?” Han asked through slow breaths.

“5 days before you can sit up and 3 weeks with the waist pressure bandage. OK?” Minho explained and rubbed Hans hand when he noticed Hans eyes close to try and manage his pain.

“How am I supposed to hold the baby?” Han asked and Minho smiled.

“I can try and put him on your chest, but you can’t move your tummy at all.” Minho was suddenly in a rush to get their baby now understanding Han hadn’t seen him yet. “I’m going to go and get him ok?” Minho smiled and Han nodded.

Minho had left the room and Han stared at the ceiling.

No more babies.

Han thought about the past few days. He had been unconscious for most of it but… He knew… He knew his life and their babies life was so close to have being lost.

Han ran a hand over his scar.

No more babies.

He struggled to believe it.

Han felt his eyes sting but before he could get lost in his own thoughts, Minho was wheeling their baby in.

Min parked the bed at the base of Hans’ and smiled to Jisung as he reached into the cot to pull out a bundle of blankets with a little head poking out.

“Young-Gu-Jin.” A jewel that completes them forever.

“Oh! Jinnie!” Han said and his eyes welled up. Minho walked over to sit next to Han so he could see. Han reached a hand for him and Minho helped manoeuvre so Han could touch him.

Han smiled wide and pulled his little blanket down to check his face. Han tried not to sob, because it would hurt, but failed and Minho hushed him.

“My dumb ass birthed that!” Han said through tears and made ‘grabby’ hands at the baby. Minho laughed and bought him over, Min gently set the baby down on Han’s chest. Han held the back of his head and looked at him in wonder. His bottom lip was poking out and his eyes blurry.

“Minho!… He’s so pretty. Min!… How did we make this?” Han cried and Minho tried not to laugh. He pulled out his phone and took a photo. Han had red eyes and messy hair but Min thought he was beautiful.

***

It was 3am and Felix snapped his head straight for the 4th time in as many minutes. The bottle in his grip was sliding down until Bilby fussed and screamed for him to fix it. Chan was snoring, having done the 5am feed last night until the 12pm this night. For the first few nights, they both woke up anyway. Now it was getting harder and harder. It just fell to whoever was awake. Sometimes Felix woke and hit Chan until he got up and made a bottle. Then he would fall asleep again with his head on Felix lap so Felix could lean on his head to support the baby while she fed.

Felix looked at Bilby through tired eyes. It was so dark; he could hardly see her. She had barely had any of the bottle but she was falling asleep again.

Felix rubbed his face and set the bottle aside. He lifted her up to burp but she didn’t wake. He patted her back until a little belch came out then gently set her back to bed.

Felix put a clip in his hair. He needed to get it cut.

Felix laid down on Chan’s shoulder and stuffed a pillow between his legs, determined to go to sleep as soon as possible.

It felt as though his head had just hit the pillow when he was jolted awake by crying from down the hall.

Felix sat up and rubbed through the mess of his hair. He checked the time. 5.30am. It was Gujin. Felix looked at Chan, wide mouthed and dark eyes as he slept. He looked to Bilby. She was awake and kicking happily. Felix rolled down to be face to face with her. He settled his head and smiled. Her eyes took some time but they found him. 3 weeks old she was now. Felix put a finger into her hand and she gripped it. Felix watched her face move in interest with a smile.

Felix heard someone in the kitchen. They had decided early on to invest in a bottle maker… Basically a coffee machine for bottles.

Felix rolled out of bed and didn’t bother with pants, just his sleep shirt which was technically Chan’s shirt at one point.

Felix picked up Bilby, supporting her head before padding out into the living area and into the kitchen where he found Minho, head resting on his forearm against the wall while the bottle maker whirled.

Felix smiled at him and said good morning. Minho lifted his sleepy head up. His apple hair bobbling with his movements. Minho hummed in acknowledgement but his eyes didn’t open.

“Rough night?” Felix asked softly as he began bouncing Bilby to entertain her until her bottle could be made. Minho just hummed again.

“At least you get like 6 hours in a row. Bilby is still every 3.”

“It’s not him. I’m still…” Minho sighed.

“Still can’t sleep?”

“Like… at all.” Minho said and rolled over to rest his back on the wall.

“If there was an issue, they wouldn’t have sent you home.” Felix supplied and swapped the bottles over.

“It’s not that there is an issue, I just can’t forget it. He was blue. In the dark, when I look at him, sometimes he looks blue. Sometimes I can’t see his chest moving. I just keep thinking ‘check, then go to sleep, check then go to sleep’ Then when I hear Bilby, I freak out. Why is she awake but Gujin isn’t? ya know?” Minho took the bottle off Felix who came to give him a hug. Felix knew Minho was out of sorts because he was actually talking about what was wrong.

“Hyung, maybe this is gods way of making up for the bad you know? Giving you a baby that sleeps!” Felix smile and Minho rolled his eyes. “I know you don’t believe in god, but I’m just saying.”

“Yeah. Thanks, Lix.” Minho sighed. “He is still here. They are both still here.” Minho said then rolled his head like he had forgotten something. “And don’t even get me started on Jisung! I think I have woken him more than Gujin has.” Minho shook his head and Felix laughed.

“I think you are allowed to… Plus, it’s only fair.” Felix gave Minho another hug before the elder dragged his feet back to his room.

Han was sitting on the bed; his face was well rested but his hair was a mess. Gujin was laying between his legs. Han had nothing but his waist bandage and boxers on. He was able to move freely now with pain medication and the bandage. Han was smiling at the funny baby as he cooed.

Minho climbed on the bed on his knees, lent over to kiss Gujin, then Han, then flopped onto his tummy, jostling both of them.

“Did you forget something?” Han asked with a smirk and Minho rolled to the side to hand Han the bottle he forgot he was holding. “Thank you, daddy.” Han said and picked up Gujin with a smile.

“I told you, you can’t call me that.” Minho said with a tired smile as he watched Han happily make faces at their baby.

“Stop ruining the innocence.” Han said in his baby talk as he started feeding Gujin.

Minho shuffled closer and wrapped an arm over Han’s legs.

“Didn’t sleep?” Han asked as he looked at his boyfriend.

Minho hummed.

“I ordered a monitor.” Han said uncertainly.

“He sleeps right here.” Minho said groggily into Han’s thigh.

Gujin slept on Minho’s side at his insistence.

“It’s for his breathing and heart rate. Like… Like a mini smart watch. It syncs to a machine and will set off if he… If he stops… You know… Breathing.” Han said and Minho frowned.

“Why do you want that?” Minho asked but his heart raced.

“Min… I can hear you… When you talk to my mum. Felix. Hell, even Changbin.” Han said and Minho groaned.

“I didn’t want you to know.”

“I guessed… Other wise why else wouldn’t you talk to me?” Han asked and nudged Min.

It was quiet for a moment. Gujin drinking was all that could be heard.

“Why… Don’t you… talk to me?” Han asked softly and Minho just held him tighter. “Because.” Han cleared his throat. “Because I know. Min. I know what happened. Not just from you. The doctors told me. My mother told me. I know it would have been awful to see.”

Minho stayed quiet and Han thought he might have gone back to sleep.

Minho eventually lifted his head.

“I never wanted you to feel sad. I never wanted you to feel pain. Then the most horrific thing that has ever happened to me was seeing you. Like that. Seeing him. Like that. And I realised It’s not that I didn’t want you to feel pain or sadness.” Minho paused, “You were there. You didn’t feel pain or sadness. You were asleep. But my heart was ripped out because… I thought I was going to lose you. I thought I was going to lose him. I just never wanted anything bad to happen to you like pain or sadness because those things might take you away from me. I can’t have that. I felt like it was my fault. I wished we never. I…” He paused again. “I actually wished we never met, then I would never have gotten you pregnant and you would have never ended up there. It hurt so much, I just wished I never knew love like I do.” Minho finished as he looked to Gujin. He wasn’t crying. It wasn’t a declaration. He just needed Han to know. He needed Han to know how much he means to him.

“Han. You and Gujin are the most important things to me. The world might not know it, but I want them to. I want everyone to know how much I love you. Even if I’m scared of loosing you.” Minho got out of the bed and went to the closet. Han’s eyes bulged. He remembered what was there.

Minho came back to sit cross legged in front of the younger.

“Han. Marry Me.” Minho didn’t ask.

“You idiot! I’m holding the baby!” Han said with wet eyes and struggled to not disturb Gujin while he got to his knees and shuffled over to kiss Minho.

Min held his face and kissed him back. Gujin grumbled when his feeding was disturbed. Han looked down with a sniffle and lifted a shoulder to wipe his eye on.

“Yes, I will.” Han said and sat back with a wide heart shaped smile.

Minho finally pulled out the box and took the ring from it. He hadn’t presented it like a typical engagement. It was a biproduct of his shyness and fear of rejection, but he took the pretty silver band and put it on Jisungs finger as he lifted them up to stick out while he held Gujin.

Minho kissed Hans forehead again, then Gujin.

He laid back down and Han couldn’t stop smiling.

It was quiet for a moment before Minho spoke.

  
“But yes, the monitor would help me sleep. Thank you.” Minho laughed and Han nudge him again.

All of a sudden Felix slid the door open and popped his head in with a sly smile.

“How long were you there for?” Han asked with a laugh. Felix giggled and came into the room, stepped on the bed, and walked up to settle on the other side to Han, mirroring his position as he continued to feed Bilby.

“Long enough.” Felix laughed as he looked between them with a wide grin.

Minho rolled over with a tired but happy smile. He grabbed Bilby’s foot and played with it.

“Soooooo…. Double wedding?” Felix asked and Han laughed.

“No! I have it all planned out.” Han shook his head and spoke quickly. He adjusted in his seat to face the other two.

“So, we get married ASAP in Australia, have a nice ceremony somewhere like Melbourne in one of those heritage buildings. String lights and everything. Have our friends and family, just like the members, then when it’s legal here, we have a big blow out in the winter, soongie, doongie and dori are there. It will be great!” Han said excitedly before adjusting Gujin to burp.

“How long have you thought about that?” Minho asked and rolled onto his back to stare at him.

“Since I found the ring hiding away.” Han said with a shit eating grin.

“You knew?” Minho smirked. Han laughed. “Ai, you shit.” Minho huffed with a smile.

“I started to think you weren’t going to do it now that I am all cut up.” Han said with a pout and Minho scoffed.

“If you weren’t so intolerable, I would have done it earlier.” Minho laughed when Han shot him a look.

Then Chan was at the door.

“Hai” Felix smiled and Chan stumbled forward sleepily and laid at the end of the bed, Felix shuffled down and Chan opened his arms for him to lay in front.

Bilby finished eating when Jeongin joined them. He wondered in with a grunt that sounded like ‘Hyunjin’ before cuddling up behind Minho and closing his eyes. Sure enough, Hyunjin followed him in with a coffee and sat in front of Han. He put his arms out to take Gujin for a cuddle. Hyunjin talked in baby excitedly.

Changbin and Seungmin weren’t far behind either. They had to go to a meeting but wanted to pop by. Changbin picked up Bilby and made ‘da da da’ sounds to her while Seungmin annoyed Jeongin by cuddling him.

Once Minho was sufficiently suffocated in the middle of the bed, he let out a scream that made everyone look.

“Hungry.” Was all he said before climbing over Jeongin and Seungmin to get out. Not without Han slapping his butt at he went.

Jeongin moved further over into the bed with every intention of going back to sleep.

Minho cooked. Felix and Hyunjin made the babies dance with them in the kitchen. Seungmin and Han played guitar, Changbin hung around waiting for food and Jeongin played among us with Chan in the dinning room.

It was beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

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